What do Richard Osman and ChatGPT have in common?
Maybe it's that they're both beautiful geniuses. (Maybe it's not)
Above: The ball pit at Night Cafe London - an open til late, booze free, ‘chill out’ space between Whitechapel and Shoreditch that is very probably the most sensory overloading place I’ve ever visited. It’s wild - let’s bump into each other there sometime.
Slow Burn
My cat died and I can only think in cliches.
*TRIGGER WARNING - THIS SLOW BURN SECTION DEALS WITH DEATH* If that’s not for you right now, please skip ahead to Hot Takes and beyond!
On April 2nd Miffin, Babel, the cat who was so good we named her twice, passed away at home at almost 15 years old, after a short illness.
I had always thought that I was *pretty ok* with the end of life, and the stuff that comes with it. During my childhood my dad was a gravedigger, until that became too physical as he got older, at which point he became a crematorium operator. Growing up, the timings of every Christmas Day were dominated by piling into the car first thing in the morning to drive him around the various cemeteries and crematoriums (‘cems and crems’ if you’re in the loop) of Birmingham so he could open the gates for people who needed to mourn, and then going back around after dinner to lock them back up again. On days when I was off sick from school I would sometimes have to go with him to work, down in the big hot room with the strange smell, where cremators were. The room that coffins would be lowered into at the end of funeral services, and then put in a queue to to take their turn. I could tell you more about what that room and those giant cremators are like, but for now just let me say - if you, for some reason, ever find yourself down there, next to the row of big hot boxes whilst a cremation is taking place - don’t look through the little windows to see what’s going on inside. I didn’t know any better, but we don’t all need to learn the hard way.
I say this to say, I thought that as people go, I was pretty clued up and comfortable with the end of life, and what comes next.
I was wrong.
Whilst I might have understood the practicalities of what to expect from a logistical point of view, the emotional upheaval was something I was wholly unprepared for.
If you’ve never had a pet that’s become an essential part of your life - someone who is the first thing you see in the morning (when their wet nose and sharp claws find your eyelids), whose little feet you watch out for all day, every time you take a step, to avoid a Miette Moment, and who climbs the stairs with you to sleep on your bed every night - you might think talking about grief in relation to a pet is silly. Frivolous. Overkill. But for us, it isn’t For us she was a huge part of everything we did, every choice made, and literally every step we took. Her loss was monumental.
Suddenly the messages written on greetings cards, that I had tried so hard to never replicate when someone I knew went through a bereavement, not only made sense, but felt like the most perfect encapsulation and articulation of the experience. If you’ve ever found yourself wondering ‘I wonder what font a forever in our hearts tattoo would look best in’, or found yourself asking ‘Is a full back piece too much? Maybe I should go for something a little classier.’ you’ll know what I mean.
(Only time will tell if I give in to either of those urges.)
If you’ve lost a pet or loved one, you’ll also know, if you dealt with it anything like me, that the things that you’ve avoided doing for so long suddenly become not only urgent, but appealing.
Cleaning the shower with a toothbrush to get rid of the limescale? Essential. Obviously. Taking the filter out of the projector to meticulously remove any traces of dust? Absolutely. Immediately. How could we have overlooked it for this long?
As all of this was happening I tried to keep things as normal as possible. I tried to write my newsletter, and to focus it on other things - but in every line you could tell just how hard I was trying to write - which is the worst type of thing to read. So I paused, that’s why this issue is slightly late. I was trying not to talk about the one and only thing I was thinking about. And so now, instead of fighting it, I’ve given it some time. I’ve got to a space where I can make the beginnings of tiny jokes. And instead of figuring out how to talk about something else, anything else, I’m telling you all about it, and her, because she was brilliant, and we miss her, and we’re really glad that we got to call her our friend for so long. If you’d met her, you’d have thought she was brilliant, too.
Hot Takes
What do Richard Osman and Chat GPT have in common?
They both know so much about the things I know nothing about (and only those things).
At a dinner recently I was speaking to someone about Richard Osman’s podcast The Rest is Entertainment - a show in which he, and Guardian journalist Marina Hyde, talk all things entertainment - from how shows, books or other pieces of media get made, to who makes decisions, and what can go wrong.
I’m someone who, when I watch a show, am just as interested in imagining and trying to figure out the hows and whys of the production team behind it as I am in the content itself. So when I first discovered the podcast, just after it first launched, I was enraptured. All of the BTS, without having to wear a lanyard, what could be better?
I will admit that at time I did find some of their views…challenging, we could say. Sheltered might also have been thrown out. But I thought they were generally will intentioned people who were just older than me enough that some of their stances on things like the class, race, access to opportunity, the good that can come from authors banding together boycott festivals sponsored by unsavoury organisations left me shaking my head - but that it was worth it for the insights from people who seemed to know so much about so much.
My working background is in media, broadcast and writing. I spent the majority of my career working in advertising in various capacities, before leaving to write books and have a couple of stints at Netflix, both as a freelancer, and a member of staff across a range of teams. I’ve been in meeting rooms, made decisions, fought my corner, and feel like I have a good grounding in the systems, and the people, that occupy those spaces.
Recently, over dinner I was speaking to an ex-BBC person, and we were talking about just how incredible it is to have a podcast like The Rest is Entertainment, demystifying parts of the sometimes deliberately opaque world of entertainment, and serving it up to us in bitesized chunks twice a week.
‘Do you ever feel,’ I asked, ‘that he knows so much, and it’s all so smart and true and insightful… until he starts talking about something that you know well. Like a job you’ve done, or a business you’ve worked for - at which point you suddenly realise - he doesn’t have a clue. Not really. Not about being on the ground as anyone other than the most important person in a room, or at least someone who is treated with a certain degree of reverence?’
‘Exactly!’ they agreed ‘like when he talks about what it’s like to be an author - and then he personally thanks the CEO of Penguin Random House for their support. Most of us have to fight to get an email back from our editor, let alone the head of our imprint, and *never* the CEO of the publisher!’ Or when he goes hard against boycotts without ever acknowledging that other people don’t have the same protections as him! It might be ok if he acknowledged that he was slightly out of the mainstream experience, but he never does! He presents all of his experiences as universally true. His advice about organising your own American book tour! It’s so jarring!’
I’m not really saying that’s his fault, but it is a difficulty. When you have a show that’s positioned as demystifying an industry for outsiders, pulling back the curtain, and you speak with such authority about ‘How Things Work’ - it’s always good to check that you’re still in touch with how things work for most people, and not just yourself. It’s so easy to lose track of the privileges, advantages and shortcuts that you quietly gain access to once you reach a certain level, both in your career, and in the public eye. People start treating you differently, you have access to different rooms and spaces, different people give you the time of day. It’s all very lovely, and you can tell yourself you’ve earned it, and maybe you even have. But you have to be aware of it, especially if you want to tell stories and make statements about things that are bigger than, or outside of yourself - systemic things, shared things, things that you might have outgrown, or that might have changed since you were there. Maybe even things that the privilege of your identity and intersections protected you from in the moment, but that still impact most other people day to day.
A few days later this popped up in my feed. I sent it to the friend
‘ChatGPT is Osman?’ I asked ‘💯’ she replied, and followed up with a screenshot from an article explaining that people can read a newspaper and believe everything it says. And then they reach an article that talks about something they know well - something about the job they do, or the area they live in for instance, and immediately they can spot all of the things that are outright incorrect. And so, knowing it’s wrong, they mentally dismiss that article, and only that article, without having their faith or trust in the other pieces they’ve just read shaken, interrupted or otherwise interrogated.
It can be hard to know what information to trust, and who from - but I think just being aware of the paradox and disconnect - and applying that skepticism more widely into areas where you’re not already an expert, is an interesting place to begin.
Recommendations
I’ve Been Watching
Offline Love - If we’ve met at The Intersection before, you’ll be aware of my recent addiction to Korean and Japanese reality TV. Although up to now, it’s mostly been Terrace House, and excellent Korean cooking shows. As someone who has never seen an episode of domestic reality TV shows like Love Island, and still isn’t really clear on what happens on Married at First Sight, or Keeping up With The Kardashians, I didn’t see this new obsession coming for me either, but I’m absolutely not complaining. Offline Love is a new Netflix show in which 25 young Japanese singles are dropped, without their smartphones or any other devices, in Nice, and are tasked with finding their ‘soul mate’ by relying on fate alone. It’s a long shot, but one I’m so deeply into. It’s also made me wonder how culturally subjective our ideas of love and soulmates are, but that’s a chat for next time.
The Residence - Shonda Rhimes is in her Wes Anderson era, and I’m here for it. I can’t tell you everything that happens, because I’m only 3 episodes in. But I can tell you it’s a fun, stylish romp, and I’m along for the ride.
Adolescence - Everyone you’ve ever met has already seen, and is obsessed with this show. If everyone else telling you to watch it hasn’t made that happen yet, then I’m probably not going to be the one to convince you. But it’s a really interesting watch, and you’d be missing out both on the masterpiece of tv making that is the show (every episode is filmed in a single, continuous, real time shot - unbelievable. I told you I love production.), and on the cultural conversation it’s sparking about modern masculinity and how we’re framing it for young boys. You don’t have to watch it, but you’ll be missing out if you don’t.
This being said, since I initially wrote this the show’s had even more attention, has been discussed in parliament, and is now being offered for free of charge screenings in schools. Whilst I’m in favour of the conversations it’s begun, broadly speaking, I do think there are some really important watch-out’s around how we engage with and frame this work for young people - watch-outs that Gina Martin expresses really well. But still, filming it in one shot is pretty cool.
I’ve Been Listening To
I recently went to the Queer Britain Museum for the very first time (I have no idea how I’d never even heard of it before either), and they had an exhibition about Bronski Beat. Their track Smalltown Boy is a song that I don’t remember ever not knowing, but one that I feel in deep love (read, obsession) with a few years ago when it became the on repeat in-car soundtrack to our holiday in Madeira in 2022. It’s a bop and you know it. Once you’ve reminded yourself just how good it is, see also this 9 minute 12” version which is, somehow, even better. You and your summer are welcome.
The Pool - I first discovered The Pool very recently, after seeing a piece that speculated that mmmaaayyyybbbbeee LCD Soundsystem had taken some inspiration from them for a song or two. Have a listen to Jamaica Running, and Jamaica Resting, and come to your own conclusions.
Joan Armatrading - if you need to dance with yourself in the kitchen, happy or sad, Joan will always have you covered.
Amy Annette’s (old) podcast What Women Want, with Amy Annette. Amy is a brilliant, funny, smart comedian who most certainly has the best and most fun intonation of any speaker I’ve ever heard. Now, this podcast is from 2019 (season 1), and 2023 (season 2), so to say I’m late to the party is a huge understatement. But let’s face it - you’re even later. Enjoy!
My own podcast, Welcome to Successville, is wrapping up its second series.You knew I had to mention it here, but it’s also the last time I’ll be mentioning it for a little while, because this week’s episode is the final instalment of season 2. Since the last issue of the newsletter I’ve spoken to:
Annabel Rivkin - Who introduced me to the concept of developing Big Crone Energy as we get older, and whose way with words I wish I was talented enough to reproduce.
Rupal Patel - This episode is exactly what I hoped the podcast would be when I first had the idea for it. Simultaneously personal and global, Rupal talked about her time in the CIA, the differences in our ideas of success in the UK vs the USA, and so much more.
Erica Ehler - The second comedian of the series (following Jayde Adams), we talked about Edinburgh hours, a comic’s relationship with the audience, and why her dad wanted her to join the army instead of pursuing a creative career.
Tasha Bailey - In this episode Tasha, AKA The Real Talk Therapist was able to bridge the gap of her personal experiences with success, and her professional therapy training to talk about her own successes, and to offer up tips and tricks for the rest of us, too.
Anne Ravanona - From being a precocious child playing the tin whistle, to now being the founder of Global InvestHer and speaking to world leaders, Anne tells us about the challenges that female founders face in securing funding, and what can be done about it.
Emma Slade Edmondson - In the eleventh and final episode of Welcome to Successville season 2, Emma tells us about the journey of writing a book, talking about race on the internet, and having a smorgasbord approach to finding the career that was right for her after graduating.
I’ve Been Reading
Careless People - a Story of Where I Used to Work. You might have seen some of the media attention that this book, which is written by an ex-Facebook / Meta employee about her time in the business, has had in the past few weeks. Not least, the best publicity it could possibly have got - Meta seeking emergency arbitration ruling to temporarily stop promotion of the book. I wasn’t sure what to expect, but having worked in a Big Tech company, and since the book is published by the same editorial team who worked on my most recent book, I thought I’d give it a go. I’ll be honest - I wasn’t sure it was for me from the prologue - and I find some of the editorial choices to be both visible and clunky, but I’m 71 pages in, and so far - I’m having a blast.
Interview Magazine - somehow every clip and post of theirs I see on Instagram feels like a whole new type of interview. Even I don’t really know what I mean, but I like it.
I’ve Been Learning
In a bid to upcycle my existing wardrobe, instead of buying new things for an upcoming holiday, I’m learning to embroider! Who would have thought it? Have I defeated the objective by finding myself online browsing for things that would be good to embroider on to? I’m allowed to have some secrets, actually.
It turns out embroidering is LOVELY, EASY, and FUN. The magic trio. if you have some time and want to get started, may I recommend this short simple video to get you blanket stitching, and this Instagram account which has some stitches that are *so* simple, but *so* impressive nothing in your wardrobe will be safe again.
Your Treat
A few weeks ago a clip from dance theatre group DV8 found its way onto my Instagram timeline. The clip shows a man dancing alone to Cher’s Believe. A song which is both a triumph of autotune, and the first time I had heard an adult say ‘cool’.
Taken on its own the clip could be about club culture, or music, or love.
It could be a precursor to these guys, who live in my heart full time.
Tiktok failed to load.Enable 3rd party cookies or use another browser
I showed the clip to my partner, and he was, unexpectedly, entranced. He’d never seen any dance theatre before, but to my surprise (and I suspect his) he wanted to see more - and so one evening we fired up the projector and settled in to watch Cost of Living in its full 34 minutes of glory.
It wasn’t until the film started that I realised I’d seen it before, probably several times. I was transported back to being a late teen, at drama school, watching things that I thought I understood, but I can now see I absolutely didn’t.
It’s a captivating short film about bodies and love and sex and desire and attraction and queerness and access and wholeness and belonging.
It’s probably also about some things that I’ll understand in a whole new way when I stumble across it again in another 20 years and realise how much I just didn’t understand, still, this time around.
I recommend watching it in its full 34 minutes (using the link above or below), but if that’s not what you have time and space for today, here’s a 4 minute extended version of the Instagram clip I shared above for you.
But you should really watch it all.
As always, I’ll leave you with Alex the parrot’s last words
‘You be good, see you tomorrow. I love you’
If this newsletter was forwarded to you by your cool friend, why not subscribe, so you never miss an issue?
And, would this even be the internet if you didn’t like, comment, and subscribe? I think not.
SW. <3
Thanks for reading The Intersection, by Sophie Williams! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.
So sorry about your beautiful kitty ♥️